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More To Love teaches plus size women how to learn body-acceptance and end dieting for good. 

Your hater is your teacher

Rachel Estapa

How would you explain the sweetness of chocolate to someone who has never tasted it?

“It’s like a velvet richness, a smooth joy gently covering your tongue and senses, leaving you drunk and surrendering.”

To a person who has never tasted, no amount of explanation can ever give them the feeling of sampling a fine piece of chocolate for the first time.

This metaphor is stretched, but not so much that the meaning is lost.

A person who has never felt the joy and peace from loving their body cannot fathom another person being able to.

I often wonder “Why do they hate us so much?” Us being larger people who defy the common assumption that with a bigger body, we much be ashamed and unhappy.

Why is it so hard to understand it’s possible to love yourself at any size?

It’s the chocolate metaphor above: they cannot because they have not experienced the soothing relief from finding love within.

From this space, I understand why they scoff at me, judge my peers, mock you for trying to love yourself. They simply haven’t experienced anything like it in their lives, a relief from a pain suffered long.

From this approach, a natural ease of compassion settles in, because for those who have experienced peace in their bones no longer are driven by the need to refuse it from others.

Self-love is a whisper, a deep calm of rest and grounding certainty of your experience. It doesn’t require applause or praise, it’s happy with you alone.

And for someone who has never swam in this endless sea of self-love, of course they think the water dangerous.

Your hater is your teacher. Don’t tell them to dive in, show them only when they ask “Can I come too?” There is plenty of this love for everyone.